By Valerie McHugh
Hey there Upper East SIN-ners, Gossip Girl here. Today, I’ve got a riddle for you to solve. Roses are red, violets are blue, does little J from Brooklyn dress better than you?
She may come from the depths of dreary Brooklyn, but this girl has got the dress sense of a real Manhattanite. Sorry Blair, but I think this little Brooklynite might have you beat in the originality section. I’ll leave it up to you to decide.
Here are 5 of Jenny Humphrey’s most fashionable moments, where she painted Constance Billiard High School green with envy.
1. Be a flamingo in a flock of high schoolers
These audacious rosy tights accompanied by a bedazzled beret are the perfect combination for a school uniform. Although these fluffy UGG boots aren’t the least bit waterproof, fashion comes at a cost. At least they will keep little J on her toes. Also, this gorgeous bag is perfect for holding loads of schoolbooks….
2. SPOTTED: Little J on the Met Steps looking like a punk rock chick
They say all one has to do to get home is click their heels together three times to make the wish come true. Well, despite Jenny Humphrey being far from her lousy loft, somehow, the top of the Met Steps has become a second home. With these stunning fishnet tights and a rocking leather jacket, Jenny is turning everyone’s heads.
3. Masquerading as a fraud
While trying to achieve her dream of becoming one of queen B’s handmaidens, our Jenny crashed the masquerade ball without an invite. But hey, at least she did it in style. This yellow gown makes her the belle of the ball, one that has our beastly Nate swooning. Accompanied by a fluffy black pullover and elegant silk gloves, Jenny is the total master of disguise.
4. Black swan amongst ugly ducklings
This black number can only be worn by a true style queen, and Jenny Humphrey? That’s you. Jenny strutted down the catwalk in a pair of glossy black heels, much higher than Chuck Bass’ ACT score. With some fabulous red lippie, Jenny is a total queen, one who deserves all the attention she gets.
5. J for Waldorf Designs
And so, it goes, Jenny Humphrey blossoms into a beautiful butterfly, designing for Eleanor Waldorf herself. Jenny saves this dazzling ensemble for her brother’s wedding, where lonely boy and princess S finally tie the knot. Her soft blonde curls are the perfect choice to finish the elegant look, and those nude shoes are ideal for a strong, sophisticated lady just like Jenny Humphrey.
I’ll be back next year to dish some more dirt on the world’s fashionistas. I can hardly wait. Stay safe Upper East SIN-ners.
You know you love me,